I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
