it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
