It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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