I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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