so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
