i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Randomize
