alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Randomize
