You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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