Already got asked if we're dating
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize
