What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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