we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
