It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Everyone says I win the strip club
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize
