We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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