Just mADE A PArabola og urine
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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