Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize