Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
