i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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