Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
