Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
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