Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
