Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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