i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Randomize
