So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
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