Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
All I want is dick and wine.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
