i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
