im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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