Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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