Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
