And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Randomize
