Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize