Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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