3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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