I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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