I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
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