she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
