Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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