As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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