can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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