Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
