i barfeds in our rink
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
