She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
