A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
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