watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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