i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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