just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
