hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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