I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
