3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
