If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize