Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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