Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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