The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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